Overcoming depression: self growth with forgiveness

A lot of people who overcame depression never forgot the experience, but managed to open themselves to self growth and forgiveness without any medications at all. Different studies have shown that most depressed people reported feeling worse while on medications than in periods of pause. Being unable to forgive and let go of the past have been the causes of depression in numerous cases.

Only a small percentage of depression cases are hereditary, but causes of all other depression types are usually unknown. Therapists, doctors and researchers have managed to recognize different types of this cruel disease and have been trying to help overcoming depression in a variety of ways ever since. Unfortunately, many health providers speed up diagnose and treatment without really investigating all the aspects and possible causes of the disease in each individual case. Consequently, people are prescribed with medications which can really have long-term negative impacts on the brain.

Doctors are usually skeptic about herbal remedies for depression, which is quite strange when we think that medicinal herbs have been used for curing various diseases since the very beginning of human life. Of course, there are certainly cases of such severe depression that it must be treated clinically or with medications, for example, if chemical brain structures have been changed and out of balance. The question is: when is the right time to visit a doctor because of symptoms of depression and how to recognize them?

What is depression?

Most people don’t even understand what depression really is, especially not various types of depression. This disease has so many different forms and each has its own name, but we mostly hear about:

  • unipolar depression,
  • bipolar disorder or manic depression
  • and major or clinical depression.

These and other types of depression have certain distinguishing symptoms, but the core of this disease or the feeling following this emotional (organic) disorder is characteristic of all depression types. Hundreds of books written by therapists and people who suffered from this unfortunate disease described depression with different thoughts and sentences, yet they all agreed about its nature and the possible means to overcome this “black dog of the night” and “noonday demon.” One of the depression quotes from such books, which can be very helpful in understanding the nature of this disease, is also:

“If you suffer with depression, a theological earthquake will shake you; the ground will yawn open and threaten to swallow up every last inch of you.” (Bonnie Keen)

Depression occurs also when a person loses a loved one, whether it’s a death case in question or a relationship breakdown, when one suffers from some other incurable or difficult disease, experiences financial troubles, family problems, marital problems, or any other painful situation which makes a person feel sad, unsatisfied, pessimistic, discouraged and demoralized. These feelings, if you don’t deal with them, slowly turn into feelings of emptiness, alienation, thoughts about life having no meaning and death wishes. On the other hand, if you cope with the problems or learn how to accept the unwanted events and situations in life, you have the chance for self growth and overcoming depression in a slow, but safe way.

Self growth and forgiveness in overcoming depression

Very often, people aren’t able to accept the negligence, failures and mistakes committed by their parents during their childhood, adolescence or adulthood. Some people are imprisoned by traumatizing experiences that marked their childhood, but of which they are not really aware in adulthood.

Others have never accepted that they are less successful, lucky or talented than other people or have developed inferiority complex for a variety of reasons. Alcohol, drug and other substance abuse in family history are very difficult to deal with because the consequences of growing up in such environment are long-term feelings of having an empty soul with no life or desire to live.

Such environment mostly pushes people over the edge so that they experience the same addiction problem or become destructive in the sense of surrendering to depression.

However, there are heroic cases in which people managed to forgive their parents, friends or boyfriends, girlfriends, husbands, wives or children who have hurt them (in the present or in the past).

They have succeeded in their attempt to give love, understanding and forgiveness, even if they themselves have felt only lack of love, faced only false accusations and have not been forgiven for the mistakes they’ve made or things they’ve done and said. This loving feeling of letting go has liberated them from depression, and although they are not walking around singing songs and laughing like crazy, they cope with feelings of sadness and dissatisfaction in another way. That’s because they experienced self growth coming from forgiveness.

Self-forgiveness

This experience of overcoming depression, self growth and forgiveness makes a person powerful and respectful, especially if the person had a problem of self-forgiveness: forgiving yourself the things you regret to have done or said is the hardest thing to do. Maybe it wasn’t lack of love that opened the pores of your bones for depression, but only the inability of people who love you to show that they actually do and your inability to accept that, forgive and move on.

Maybe your father never kissed you or never really took care of you as a father should, but you must remember those rare moments when you actually felt that he does love you. Who knows? Maybe your father never learned to receive love and therefore, maybe he was raised with an impaired sense of love and simply couldn’t give you anything better because he knew nothing better. Maybe your mother did mistakes, but the reasons for committing them were never connected directly to you. Maybe a friend or boyfriend, girlfriend, husband or wife couldn’t love you, but it was not because you weren’t good enough. It simply wasn’t meant to be or they had some kind of emotional disorder keeping them from true or healthy love.

Forgiveness and understanding will nourish your self-growth and chances of overcoming depression no matter the problem, sad events or reasons that caused you to suffer from this lifeless feeling. Think about the following wise and true quotes, write them down and hide around the house so that you accidentally come across them and remind yourself:

“Do not brood over your past mistakes and failures as this will only fill your mind with grief, regret and depression. Do not repeat them in the future.”

(Swami Sivananda)

“You can’t undo anything you’ve already done, but you can face up to it. You can tell the truth. You can seek forgiveness. And then let God do the rest.”

(Author unknown)

“Sincere forgiveness isn’t colored with expectations that the other people apologize or change. Don’t worry whether or not they finally understand you. Love them and release them.

(Sara Paddison)

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