Should You Date Your Friend’s Ex?

There are times when you might find yourself attracted to a friend’s ex and even if you know to steer clear while they are dating each other, it does not mean that there will not be a time in the future when you find yourself with a decision whether to date your friend’s ex or not. Below are some tips that could help guide you in this tricky situation of dating a friend’s ex.

Give it time. Even if you are interested in the person that your friend is dating, it does not mean you can immediately date him or her once things do not work out with them. It is not time to start wearing pheromone cologne and finding opportunities to meet with the person. Instead, wait for any wounds to heal and especially for your friend to be over him or her.

Give your friend the heads up. After your friend has gotten over the ex and you get the chance to reconnect with this ex, give your friend the heads up even before the first date. You can either ask your friend if it is okay or you can just simply let your friend know that you might date the ex. This would prevent the situation where your friend will find out about it from someone else. Even if your friend has gotten over the ex, letting him or her know is simple courtesy. However, if it was a really bad breakup, expect your friend not to give his or her approval.

Expect a rough patch. Depending on how the relationship between your friend and the ex ended, expect that there will be a rough patch for all three of you. Your friend will have to get used to the idea of you being with the ex, the ex will have to get used to the idea of dating an ex’s friend, and you will have to get used to the idea that your friend used to date him or her. It might be some time before all three of you find a good dynamic together but rest assured that if all parties are willing to work things out, you will all get to a good place where past is past and you can all enjoy each other’s company.

Do not do anything while they are together. There should be no need to address this because it is obvious that dating someone who is dating your friend is totally foul. Even if you make the excuse that pheromones attract women or men, there is no valid reason to do this. Forget all possibilities of dating while your friend and the other person are still dating.